Champions

Went to National Stadium on a chartered bus with the other non-tracker supporters. Greeted by the same atmosphere of cheering students just like the previous years, but this time I was motivated to go for a different reason: that I must fulfil what I have said and to support my friends. Earlier, Raymond wanted me to go mug with him at KFC. After all, what difference can one individual make to the score? Nevertheless, I wanted to go; different from last time when I just went.

Heavy rain dampened the air. Initially feared that it will be postponed. Thankfully, the rain subsided, but not before disintegrating my file which was already in a lousy condition. Finally, the chase for points ended, RJC team(especially the guys) putting up a commendable fight till the finish. A fitting finale, in which the guys thrashed the 4X400m record and won by a narrow lead of 7 points. Still remembered Mr Seem, when we were the 1st team to train at the National Stadium, on how the team would conquer the stadium, which turned out to be a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Grateful that I am able to at least have a glimpse of the championship trophy, the first time in six years of track that the team is the champion. Finally, Track and Field ended gloriously on what the cross country people have started. Sang the school song slowly with pride, probably the last time as being part of the team. Just as they did their victory lap, before their celebratory dinner, I left among the crowds with my soggy shoes, wet clothes, stained notes and all. Doesn't matter, for the rain tastes sweet, and the victory is much more than I can ever ask for. :) The End on the Chapter of Track and Field. <p>

Amendment

I shall go for the track dinner though I cannot stay for long, then I shall visit my friend. Heard that his leg was swollen with a funny insect bite...and he must be feeling lonely and bored at home. Must tell him all the work he has missed ..and about the track victory tomorrow...:) Hope he recovers soon.

The Last Assignment.

Despite the disillusions I had of myself, Michael, Justin and Wenxu never gave up on me. Just now, Justin invited me for the track dinner, which I feel must be truly amazing grace...for such a wretched guy like me. (its from a hymn I heard long time ago)...Feel really touched, for which for the 1st time no words can describe my feelings. The least I can do is to support them to my hearts out tomorrow at the finals.

Have this resolution...that if my track mates have the courage to place their trust in me, then I will muster whatever remnants that I have to support them at their most crucial moments and to find Mr Lee, my track teacher-in-charge. (or Miss Poon....-.-')Amazingly for the 1st time in a decade, the trackkers have a chance of getting the double golds.

For the last time, I shall make my stand and stop running from my problems. Tomorrow shall be the day where all my problems will be gone....Nevertheless, I shall forgo the track dinner tomorrow, as I need to visit a sick friend of mine. He must be feeling sad and lonely missing school for 2 days and I shall pay him a surprise visit...:)

Sailing CIP

Supposed to meet Fong Peng at Eunos MRT at 730 am, but ended up meeting her at Bedok station 1/2 hrs later. It was raining very heavily and hence I was wondering half the time whether the CIP would be cancelled. Both of us took a taxi to the inaccessible National Sailing Centre, near Carpark G where no buses seem to come. (Note: G was also voted the favourite place in Lifestyle! for couples to make out, because nobody seems to come here, except sailors and sea sports people. Just don't make out too near the sea, there are many dense bushes nearby)

Thankfully, I brought my minuscule umbrella and sheltered the both of us hurriedly to the canteen. Initially thought that the place would be deserted, and had a rude surprise (okay maybe pleasant) when I saw Chorale (which I happily told Raymond later), Sea sports and sailors gathered under one roof. Paid what I owed them and received a complimentary black shirt, which I gratefully changed over. The little children finally came. The Chorale, Sea Sports and sailing people went over to play some icebreaker games, while the two first aiders remained nonchalant. Meanwhile, Mr Lee Chee Keong and Mr Edward Ng were passing the time by lazing at one corner talking. Sometimes Mr Edward would be enthusiastically talking about students, with Mr Lee joining in with much interest, though I could not hear much. Strangely, Mr C.K looked almost the same without his spectacles.

Bonus for avid readers: I.u.h.a.i.j was wearing pink pants, very distinct. You have to be blind not to notice.  Heard a very long time ago from a tape, that physical beauty only last for 3 months the most. What's more important is beyond that; because a person is made up of three parts, the body, soul and spirit. (though sadly the world chooses to emphasise the 1st but ignore the 2nd and the 3rd, hence their marriages are only 1/3 as fulfilling)

Since we were officially not included in any games, we had no choice but to drown ourselves in a sea of books (unless something unfortunate pops up, which we have to render aid.) Was so bored that I studied thermodynamics as a last resort. Which was torturous absorbing new equations. Fong Peng was also doing the same, burying her head in an econs tys.

Lunchtime came. We dared not take the food first, since we really did not do anything. Others who had put in the hard work should have their fill first. It was supposed to be an enrichment camp as well, teaching the young children meaningful skills such as sailing. In the end, it was reduced to soccer, slacking and sailing mostly by sailors only. Was really bored until Charmain came to our table with a bleeding third finger. Using my amateur skills, I managed to stop the bleeding only after using up two sterile gauze, cotton wools and much Dettol. Hoped I had not hurt her too badly, caused she screamed when I tried to wrap the gauze as gently as I could. Finally her finger stopped bleeding, and my 2nd wrap was a much better-looking version that the initial mummified finger. Treated a few abrasions here and there, with people toying with my new First Aid Box, which I adopted from an abandoned looking corner of RJ canteen.

Nearing the end of the day, the Chorale women (sounds strange though, girls sounds nicer) went to the end of a jetty to have a soultalk?latest rumour exchange? I might never know. Girls of the same feather flock together. Meanwhile, I.u.h.i.a.j was constantly "harassed" by the little children under her charge, with them splashing water bombs at her.

Finally, after lazing around and gazing the horizon for 5 hrs++++(lost track of time liao), the CIP ended. For the first time in my 2 years of CIP, I was actually bored at slacking. Left the scene quietly with Fong Peng and took a taxi back to Bedok station.

Track and Field

Six years have passed and I have learnt quite a bit from my only CCA. Was attracted to it like moth to a lightbulb during Sec one, when I first raced with CJ (for those who dunno, Junasis) across the astroturf before orientation.  As long  as I have the will, there will be a way. Deluded myself into thinking, hoping against hope that as long as I had put in the extra effort, the teachers will notice and have pity on me. Four years I have struggled, for the 1st two meekly gave way to my seniors to get glory, for the last two getting displaced by my juniors. Tried in all inter-house sports events. When I disqualified, I always tried to convince myself that I will do better next time. Just 50 cm more, two more footsteps, extend your legs higher.

The next time never came at the end of four years. Since Mr Jeffrey Chan and Mr Malek were away for most of the time, they dismissed me as nothing and talentless, an anonymous face, since I never represented the school or had the chance. Sweat and tears had been shed while no one noticed. My kind ( i mean it)teacher, Mr Eric Lee even had to ask me to fill up the blanks in my testimonial that the track teachers left. At every track camp, athletes will always be talking about their aspirations in making it to National Finals, while I would be silently hidden among the shadows, listening but never to be able to feel their passion, longing....

During Sec four, Mr Kang became our new coach. Training was rigorous but fulfilling. For the first time, hard work was key to favour. The jumpers and throwers were under him, hence were more united than before. We often had communal lunch at S11 after training. Enjoyed the company of my fellow jumpers and my motivation to train was to strengthen my friendship with the jumpers. The rag-tag team of jumpers comprising Yong Shen, Yong Sheng, Clement, Wang Kan and I was formed to represent several invitational relays in various schools. (This is so as to allow key trackers to rest and protect them against overexertion; to allow them to perform at the optimum at Nationals). Even though it was obvious that we were substitutes, I relished the chances to just compete together, in competitions that the PE department did not recognise.

Thought that in JC, everything will be different. I was confused by the frenzy in obtaining the PEARLS during the initial 3 months. Unfortunately, I was hit with pneumonia before I could think seriously of my options. Since I had neither the sport or musical talents, I rejoined track. (you see, most sports and musical groups were formed from many students from the same CCA in secondary school). With a different culture, things will improve. Though things were tough and lonely during the initial 6 months, I bit my tongue and held on. Since I joined in late, I had to rebuild my fitness, which often involved sprints for 300 m, rest, and repeat for 10 rounds alone  Ran until I felt like fainting, with undescribable throbbing of my head. Two showed concern. One was my captain, the other Nonis. Thus I trained hard and made it a point to come for every training, hoping that with time, my technique will improve.

My track teachers allowed me to represent the school for minor competitions. However, I had failed them terribly, as I had always disqualified. The spirit is willing , but the flesh is weak. Though they never said it, I could sense the disappointment in their voices. Had fun and laughter, looking forward to trainings just to hear wisecracks and lame jokes, especially from Nonis. Worsened the misconception that as long as one put in more hard work, the result will be accelerated.

During the start of May, my mother was hospitalised and later discharged but was confined at home. My little sis and dad will quarrel frequently, each getting more violent and intense. Could not spend a day without worrying whether one will end up in police station, girl's home or the hospital. Afraid that my mother will die if this continues. Tried to reach home as early as possible, training half-heartedly just to neutralise any sparks. Expectedly, I failed again for the last major competition I would join. Hung my head in shame, for the coach had placed faith in me, and time and time again I could not deliver.

I have disillusioned myself. My pride had blinded me into thinking that talent could be achieved through hard work. How come I did not see it coming, even though I was in track for six years? The last flicker of hope has been extinguished. Realised that no matter how hard I train, I will never achieve the result I desire, as my potential has limits. Decided that I will have to stay at home to take care of my ma. Never told any of the trackers or the teachers, because I feel guilty and sad for leaving them, and that they might never understand my family problem. Besides, why must I selfishly insist on fighting for a place in the team, knowing well that I could not get a point for the school despite my best efforts?Why should I train alongside with them 1 month before Nationals, taking up their valuable training time with the coach? They need all the attention and troubleshooting they can get from Mr Seem to perform optimally.

One month has passed since then. Justin ignored me, which is normal of him to react this way after what had happened. Somehow no words came out from me, as I do not know how to express myself. Is it futile to explain everything? Does it mean a sign of weakness or an excuse? How do I tell them that they were wrong to put their faith in me, always thinking that my past dedication will manifest into talent, when it will never happen. Cried silently to myself that night, for my lack of courage and my searing conscience...

Boiling Point

Results have been dismal so far. Added a 10 to my strings of Kings in this ill-fated Common test so far, though it could have been a Jack, but I chose not to bother with the trivial begging of 2 marks at this point of time. Read through my friend's blog. Similar to his predicament (though his expectation is very much higher than mine), somehow the one month hiatus (i.e. no CCA) apparently did me no good. Even though I tried to study according to schedule during the 28 days, the results do not show (yet I pray). Is it true that studying last minute helps, like Raymond who effortlessly got his Aces? Why?

If the teachers want to agitate me into revising wiser, more ruthlessly, and more diligently after this calamity, I must say they have succeeded. Boiling point has been reached. The only thing I feel sorry about is when the Cambridge markers receive our scripts in 7 months times, when they will all receive our pent-up but flawless answers from not only me but 700+ students in our cohort...RAAWWWR...."and the Beast was released from its cage. Not realising the peril he was in, the Owner put his hand in its mouth..."

Today shall be my 3rd last entry (I think) for a long time. Watched a GP video about Philosophy and Religion. It had made me think a lot about faith, relativisim, naivete and life. Wondered if I had too little faith to start with. If getting a string of not so good results does not shake you, then good for you. Really. But if you place your trust on your own experiences, isn't that the same as what the world perceives, that is only the present natural circumstances? What difference then would be our senses and faith?

Read through one of Desert Rose's good friend and classmate's blog, about how helpless she felt in her struggle with faith as well. Looks like I am not alone. (Hint: that's already a very big clue to who I am talking about.. Anyway, she's also one of the few person I admire as well.) Think she must have done relatively well this time as well.

Not much happened today, except perhaps the fact that I nearly had an encounter with a thief in the wee hours. As I was walking through a deserted section of White Sands alone, a teenage guy cycled past me hurriedly. Immediately, a shout was heard. The owner of the van who distributed Gardenia and Sunshine (to NTUC) was ruffled that the teenage boy tried to sneak off with a packet (?) of bread, but failed. Is it poverty, a dare from his gang that motivated him I will never know. Suffice to say, I could have stopped him in his (bicycle) tracks easily if I wanted to, but since he rode with nothing except a bruised ego, we just watched him cycle away.

Floorball was much better this time. Gradually improved but still need to learn how to tackle past a defender. Jasmeet's team surprisingly got thrashed in the 2nd and 3rd match. Guess that my body is getting used to this sport after a week, as I feel less lethargic and more alive.

Tea with MOE

Just came back from Buona Vista. Could have been playing LAN with Eddie Cai and Ginway, but realising that Eddie was a "bad influence", Zhengxian and I decided to go for the talk instead. Eddie vigorously tried to tempt us to play, but we stood our ground. Had to wait for Zhengxian for a brief moment, as he originally wanted to rest at home. Saw my senior heading to the overhead bridge. Initially thought that he was going as well (which explains for the overwhelming response). Turned out that he was going to NUS.

Went there early, with medium security around us. We deposited our bus passes in exchange for visitor tags. Saw the Desert Rose's name. What a pleasant surprise. (actually half-expected her as well). Looks like she is not here yet.

The talk lasted for 1 1/2 hours. Felt n0nchalant about this, as teaching does not really appeal to me. Regardless, if opportunity comes (and grace), I will not miss it. Sat near Nic tan, Sng and Sx. At the end of the talk, I finally saw the Desert Rose. She truly lives up to her name, wearing a simple red outfit.

I still do not comprehend why after these many months, I still find her attractive, despite encouragements (or rather discouragements) from friends to move on. She must have been pretty smart (i.e pretty and smart). Dared not woo her now, as I'm scared of breaking whatever fragments of friendship that I have with her; And she needs to study as well, and do well....cant be a bad influence. Even if somehow I manage to be successful, it won't last long under this testing times of exams. Anyway, my head tells me that I have to concentrate on my subjects, to upgrade all my kings to aces. Forget about her.....temporarily. Am thankful that I get to see her everyday, and that she is safe and sound.

Aces and Kings

Dr Chan said something which made me reflect. I asked him why Mn2+ and Cr2+ had such a great difference in standard potential (even though that one has only a +1 proton difference). Then he told me that chemistry is also like the grades you get. For example, 1 mark less than an A also has a lot of difference.

Getting 2 kings is sad. The aces were so near, yet so far. Nevertheless it taught me that I cannot, and will never be complacent. Still remembered and was touched by how my Chinese teacher 2 years placed great faith on us even though I had obtained C5 for Chinese during Prelims (for those who know who, she's Mdm Tong..). Just wished, hoped and finally believed that through the vigorous practise I'm gonna put starting from tomorrow, I will not disappoint Dr Chan and co.

The Kings must go....and be replaced by aces. Lord, guide me and Excalibur. Then guide me as well.

Blackout at Whitesands

Had to go out and buy lunch for myself, as there was no food at home. Went to Whitesands to have a decent lunch. On the way up to the food court, the whole place suddenly had no lights. It felt weird as I saw shadows of people who were either queueing up or having their meals. Amazingly, the escalators still functioned. Thankfully, the blackout occured during the afternoon, where the sunlight shone through the top ceiling. If it was at night, it would be more chaotic.

The blackout was starting to take a toll on business. Disgruntled people were going out in droves, including me. Went to Tampines Mall instead to try Yoshinoya for the first time. I wanted to take a look at the video game store to view FFX-2, but that place was under renovation.

At least the house is peaceful. No major quarrel has broken out, though my little sis and my pa still stare daggers at each other. Reflected on what my friend told me the other time, about how she is still my only little sis despite her shortcomings (and mine). Must learn how to coexist peacefully and treasure her more.

Changi Village

School today ended on a boring note. Both Alvin Ong and I felt that this bio practical is the most useful (at least for the 1st part) for the whole of 2 years. Mr Chan kindly went through all the plant bio jargons we will ever need to know, then left us to review a dozen plus slides.

Went to the open badminton court near the famous redhouse bridge together with Alvin Ong, just to witness Zhengxian's team lose 10-7 to Ken Toh's in a friendly intraclass soccer match. Initially thought that the stranger in Yuepeng's team was their senior but turned out that none knew him. Apparently he was just some RJ senior. Alvin Ong had to meet Edwin in the canteen for some stuff. Went alone to the train station as the 3H guys chilled out at 7-11.

Was about to set off to City Hall, when A.O called and asked me to wait for Ray and Ginway. Missed about 3 trains before they finally strolled in. Still, I went off alone to the Rock to meet my elder sis. Her boyfriend came just in time for the midweek service. Amazingly, I felt refreshed after that session, even though I ate very little and had no afternoon nap.

My sis prodded her boyfriend to drive us to Changi Village for supper. Realised that this is a food haven for NS guys like me in 1 years time. Had a filling supper of Nasi Lemak and teh tarik, courtesy of James. I guess that being a sibling has benefits.

Food Review:
Consisted of ikan bilis, otak, sweet chilli, egg and 3 generous chicken drumsticks.
Location: International Food No. 57 (genuine and the one and only Nasi Lemak) stall
(I'm serious, the heading of the stall was like that.)
Food rating: 4/5. Perhaps I am a fussy eater, but in order to be a food connoisseur when I retire, I must evaluate food critically.
Downside: Though the chicken wings were crispy, the meat tasted normal. Can be further improved.

Felt that the stall had a monopoly in selling Nasi Lemak, as James had to wait for 25 minutes just to order 3 plates. Some joker in front ordered ten packets (!!)The queue was quite long, while the stall opposite (selling the same content) had virtually none. Stray cats were on the prowl, though they looked quite fat to me.

Had a GP flashback while I was given a ride home. Transsexuals were roaming about , trying to clinch desperate men off the streets of Changi Village. Disgusting. Personally, I felt that it was quite easy to differentiate transsexuals from real females. The former has an unnatural beauty. My sis decided to visit my house to look at her beloved rabbit, Cuchi for a brief moment, before going off with James to the nearest petrol station.

Sad

Just burst out at my little sis. She knows she is in the wrong, yet is too arrogant to admit it. I'm tired of seeing the old scenes repeating over and over again, my dad and my little sis quarreling. Sometimes I wish that I can send both to some distant Survivor Islands. Combining my dad's short temper with my sis's vitriolic tongue is like adding oil to fire. If only both of them just shut the @#$% up, then both my ma and I can have peace.

Spoilt my day thoroughly. Wanted to actually go to Youwei's house to enjoy a sleepover combined with half the class outing (actually less than 1/3). Sorry man. Couldn't . Must remain at home to make sure nothing violent happens. Hope the rest enjoyed :(

Sad things aside. Ginway and Eddie came over to my place, since I told them I couldn't go out. They arrived at around 11pm. Ginway manage to qualify for nationals (unlike me) after some intense selections. Good for him and I wish him all the best. Set up playstation for them to slug to their hearts out. Not surprisingly, whoever used the turbo controller wins.

Stopped just on time for Euro 2004 Finals. Despite Ginway and I rooting for the much offensive Portugal, we lost. (actually, I win no matter what was the outcome, since my mother betted on Greece and said she would treat me to Swensen if she won...so..). After that disappointing outcome, Ginway and Eddie continued to play Metal Slug until they were worn out. They left at around 630. After that, I went back to sleep.

Women

Very funny. Was happily spending my time reading through my friend's blog when I came across this.



ELEMENT: WOMAN
SYMBOL: WO
DISCOVERER: ADAM
ATOMIC MASS:
Accepted as 53.6 Kg, but known to vary from 40 to 200 Kg.
OCCURRENCE:
Copious quantities in all urban areas.

Physical Properties:

1. Surface normally covered with a painted film.
2. Boils at nothing, freezes without any known reason.
3. Melts if given special treatment.
4. Bitter if incorrectly used.
5. Found in various states ranging from virgin metal to common ore.
6. Yields to pressure applied at correct points.

Chemical Properties:

1. Has great affinity to gold, silver and a range of precious stones.
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no apparent
reason.
4. Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increases by saturation in
alcohol.
5. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

Common Uses:

1. Highly ornamental.
2. Can be a great aid in relaxation.
3. Very effective cleaning agent.

Tests:

1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in the natural state.
2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen.

Hazards:

1. Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.
2. Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be
maintained at different locations as long as specimens don't come
into contact with each other.