Ya Kun on a stormy day

On that afternoon, I woke up from my slumber and went to White Sands to meet up with my elder sis. Dark clouds were gathering. Helped her to carry some rabbit litter, before going to this little corner of White Sands---Ya Kun, to have afternoon tea.

Though it was just opened, it managed to attract many customers; the seats were almost all occupied. Neither the incessant pitter patter of the raindrops nor the cramped space dampened my spirits; I was happy, as I haven't seen my elder sis in a long time.

Talked about many things, as my elder sis inquired about Pa, Ma, Girl and I. Time passed quickly; we finished many plates of butter toast by the time the rain became a drizzle. The butter toast leaves a saccharine taste, while the coffee is a tad bit diluted.

Dragged myself home with the two bags of rabbit litter together with my elder sis, who was paying a visit.

Wrong Service

Made a wasted trip down to the Rock. Assumed that it was Campus today, when in fact it was for Young Adults. Nonetheless, it was a good exercise for my legs, which have been accustomed to my computer chair, sofa and my bed.

The Clerk at CMPB (central manpower base) really has a knack of sending recruits like me to faraway places. Have to report to my temporary home at Choa Chu Kang by 10 pm, which meant that I have to leave home by 8

I shouldn't complain; I am paid, wait given an allowance to eat, sleep, study and maintain my fitness, though I prefer to be deferred soon, just like many of my peers.

Love and Help

In between cutting wires (which hurts my hands terribly), blog surfing and chatting on MSN, I was thinking of some questions that have been bugging me for some time: Why do people help each other? Must one associate helping others with ulterior motives? Why can't I help just for the sole purpose of helping, without getting anything back in return? Can't I just derive my satisfaction from just helping and seeing the other party resuming his normal life? Frustrating, in that most people will be on guard if you help them.

Another case will be about love, in a generic sense. Why do you love? Why do I love? Must there be a logic or reason behind love, just like rendering aid? Honestly, I do not know for years; until I read this part:

"In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins." 1 John:10.

"We love Him because He first loved us. If someone says, 'I love God,' and hates his brother, he is a liar, for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen, how can he love God whom he has not seen? And this commandment we have from Him: that he who loves God must love his brother also." 1 John: 19-21

Notice that the word love is used as an action, not an emotion? Perhaps it can answer some doubts, because for years I have been struggling to answer that question. Hmm, touch on some personal issues today.

Went out with my mother to have a haircut and marketing. Noticed this aged woman in the hawker centre while taking my breakfast. She was so old, yet was given the burden of clearing the dishes after every patron had left. As she struggled to carry the cups from table to table, I was left wondering where have all her children gone to.

Is it true that idealism decreases as we age? In 10 years time, I still want to see everyone else alright and happy, though at times I ponder to myself whether it is just wishful thinking.

Shall continue cutting wires while searching for the elusive blog.

Signal Operator

Unfortunately, Terence and I are separated right at the start of Day 1; both of us will be having different vocations. Since what I am and will be studying is RESTRICTED (in case some nosey officers stumble onto my blog and complain), I cannot reveal much. Generally, going to Signals Institute is like going to boarding school, with occasional pumpings thrown in to maintain our fitness (maintain being the key word here).

I am quite blessed to learn many practical skills there, possibly being lifeskills. In this study-intensive 9 weeks course, I got a chance to be a technician and navigator. Learning physics, communications engineering (wtf!) and radio communications there as well, which Eddie Cai would be very pleased. At the end of the course, we will be sent to learn how to drive military vehicles.

Misconception: My vocation rewards people with free driving license.

Truth: It is not free. Have to clock

7000km of driving distance in 2 years of NS (7000!) to be converted to civilian license. And only 1/2 of my platoon (12 out of 24 in my platoon, going by the numbers probably) will be learning driving; you will only get the license if you pass.

Food served is

much better than BMT. However, to make up for quality, quantity is compromised, sadly. IPPT training at Signals Institute is like PE lessons in JC. Afraid that my fitness can only be maintained there, so I would prolly have to go out and train. I feel less fit now than BMT.

Toilet facilities are comparatively better here than BMT. At least we have the decency to have closed doors when we bath. The same cannot be said of our bunks though. Beds at BMT are much better, and there are

no ratholes in the corridors at Tekong. :S :S :S. There is not much regimentation, since we are here to learn. Handphones are allowed (including charging) after office hours. As long as we keep the areas clean, we can munch on tidbits.

Much to learn there. Not as slack as Dingjie's vocation though (:, but I am glad to be learning. Hoping to get my

blue beret soon. Got a test on Monday; have to start a diesel-powered generator...

"She frickin blocked me" =p

This flash presentation is quite accurate on how I felt last year, when I was still madly infatuated with the Desert Rose. (as my friend has put it well,it is most difficult to approach a girl whom you know, but never talk to)

Sometimes, one must learn to laugh off a bad day; it does not last forever. Enjoy. =)

www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/blockedme.php

Action Movie Clip (that will make any computer graphic programmer proud)
Stuffs you see in Action Movies

Credits to Ken Toh on his resourcefulness.

Three Unrelated Events

These events happened over the span of one week. They are neither consecutive nor linked:

Class gathering:

Glad to see some of my classmates again. Rested in the comfort of Val Lau's house for a stayover. Unfortunately, I could not stay over due to my persistent cough that will flare up during the night; I have to rush back to take my antibiotics. Not very nice spreading the cough around to my classmates. Hope they had fun there playing mahjong and PS2. The word "hospitality" seemed to have eluded my mind that night; I was racking my brain to find that word (that's what army does to your English) , hence was never able to thank the host for her hospitality. Hiaz.

Deserted RJ:

Went back to a deserted RJ with Raymond. The staff office was locked, so we had to pass all our documents to the general office. Met Roderick along the way; he was posted to MP (military police). Lucky chap. At RI, Amogh and John were resting after their game of tennis; both are posted to OCS. On our way home, both of us were silently thinking of our temporal postings in the army...

Mini T.T.C gathering:

Walked around City Hall area many many times (exaggeration here just to prove our impatience and tiredness) before settling on another dining experience at Cafe Cartel. Out of the original Treetop members, only Zhengxian, Ginway, Eddie and I came. Surprisingly, we did not eat as many pieces of bread as before, but nonetheless, I treasure the outing. It adds some colour to my otherwise drab existence of home confinement.

Transient

Pain is transient, and so is the rest given in my block leave. Reflected about my BMT and felt that I have already put in my best. Didn't chao kheng or wayang, so I guess that my 2 years stint in the army was decided by the computer a long time ago. One of my best friend who excelled in all his tests during his BMT also didn't get his heart's desire. The grass always seems greener on the other side.

At least I can take comfort in the fact that Terence (and maybe Jon Teh) will end up as my section mates. Hence I shall cease blogging about my army life; his blog will definitely be peppered with anecdotes. Still remembered telling the assessor:

"So do you want to be an officer, sergeant, or man?" A long pause.

"I would rather be either an officer or a man, but never a sergeant."

Used to tell all my friends that after BMT, I will never ever want to see the ferry again; to be posted anywhere in mainland but not in Tekong. Guess that my dream came true, but in an unexpected way. It seems that the words you utter have a powerful effect in your life.

It might/will/shall? be a blessing in disguise; if I was posted to OCS instead, I would harbour a bittersweet feeling. After the temporal exhiliration, I would have been quite worried; the tough training and the minimum requirements required to pass the course (as in physical tests) are way above my fitness now.

Yes, it might sound as an excuse/reason. Maybe it is both. Since a door has been closed, I shall go to another. =). (though I yearn to learn all the academic stuffs taught in command schools, but nonetheless, I too have skills to pick up and excel in.)

Indolence

Perhaps caused by the hot weather, I see little or no sign of activity on MSN or Battlenet. Where has everyone gone to?

Due to the searing heat that I endured during the National Education Trail, I succumbed to a slight fever (caused partly by my foolishness of refusing to wear a cap). Now I am confined to sleeping and eating at home. There is little joy in going online, since I know that most of my friends won't be there (strangely).

Wonder how is the future generation going to survive this kind of milieu---the increasing temperature and the extremely tough competition starting at primary school till retirement. Surely it does not bode well for them. :S

Rested enough, as I had spent the last 7 hours on my bed. Since I cannot do any physical workout, I shall read instead. Hopefully it doesn't bore me.

A Silver Lining: In Field Camp

Despite how I used to hate field camp, there are a few moments that my comrades and I can enjoy and relax. Though rare, I greatly appreciated those times which revived my spirits, even though it was a major trial for me.

My section mates

Sergeant Hostage

Camou comrades

Coxford Dictionary for BMTers

Since I have completed many of my objectives today, (actually not really complete, 1/2 done, the other half is waiting for the teachers), I shall compile a mini-dictionary for all those future recruits, sons-waiting-to be born and any guy below 18 that stumbles here.

A-Z:

• "Arti Drill"---Full name is artillery drill. When this happens, guys are supposed to jump into any nearby bush, and lay flat on the ground, with a hand on your neck (to simulate artillery bombardment). Once they say "Arti lifted", you have to sprint and shout "Arti, Arti, Arti " ad nauseum with everything on for 1km , at the same time feeling stupid.
  Usually the most hated drill followed by sniper drill.
• AIRBORNE---One of the many songs which recruits have to sing.
• Anti-malaria pills---Recruits will eat one white pill each every week. They must stick out their tongues (with the pills on it) to the platoon sergeant to verify that they have eaten.
• Area cleaning---a rountine done every morning. Sometimes comes along with Stand-by area/bed/universe (see below)
  
• "Ba long long"---origin of phrase is unknown. Means taking your own sweet time. Used often in angry sarcasm. A prelude to pumpings (aka punishments)

  Eg: "You recruits still ba long long ah? Take your time, take your time..."

• Barang barang---meaning all your stuffs that you carry during your route march. Which can weigh up to 20 kg.
• BCCT--Basic Close Combat Training. Most hated of all courses, since "sadistic" instructors freely mete out punishments at noon. Recruits learn the art of punching, kicking and rifle slamming.

  Common Usage: "@#$%, that guy really pisses me off..one day I shall BCCT him ah..."

  
  
• BIC---known as Battle Induction Course. Usually the last part of field camp. Recruits have to crawl under barb wires on hot sand on noon, with a Machine gun firing above. Makes recruits so sandy that ppl will think that we just came from the desert.
• Camou Cream: Edible green/black paste which is used to smear our faces.
  
• Canteen break/E-mart break---Time that recruits enjoy at night. A privilege.
• CAT 1: Another term for lightning-prone areas. Everyone in the field must seek nearest shelter.
  
• Cheap Labour---Official name for sai gang. See "Sai Gang"
• "Chao Kheng": Jia Zhua (eat snake)/slack
  
• Colonel---the highest ranking officer in BMT. Anybody within 50 m radius of him must salute (to him).
• Confinement---A form of punishment which recruits have to sign. Self-explanatory.
• Fastcraft: A nicer name for the slow-moving ferry.
  
• FBO---Full Battle Order. Official name for barang barang. See above.
• Field Camp---euphemism for it is "7 day package tour around Tekong". Recruits learn to live and be one with nature.
• Five BX--Five Basic Exercises. A morning ritual.
  
• Foxhole---misleading name. It is actually a deep narrow trench up to 2m deep that can protect 2 people. Takes 10 people to dig one.
• GAC---grenade assault course. Recruits will get to throw only 1 grenade throughout their 2 years of NS.
• Heli evac---helicopter evacuation. Only for cases so serious that he has to be send back to mainland to be treated.
• Hell---what sergeants give you during the first few weeks of BMT.
  
• IMT----the place where recruits train to be virtual marksman, using a computer simulated program to shoot at virtual enemies.
• IPPT---NAPFA without the sit and reach.
• Kiwi---Not the New Zealander Bird. A brand of boot polish used extensively by recruits. Often, the floor is stained in black.

  Eg: "You testing my patience is it? You got kiwi your boots or not?" Recruit is supposed to say "No" *ominous*
  

• Knock it down/Half left down---The old time favourite punishment meted out by all sergeants. Upon hearing this command, recruits must clap twice, raise their right fist in the air (shouting their company name at the same time), and get in position. Permission must be asked to carry on. Recovery follows the same process.

  Eg: "Whole lot of you, knock it down". "Clap, Clap , "Scorpion!" "Permission to carry on sergeant" "Carry on, Down" "One" "Down" "Two" and so on (ranges from 5-40)

• LAW: Light Anti-Tank Weapon. Job in SIT test(see below) that everyone hates to be, besides the medic. A long cylindrical metal blob weighing 10kg, which the poor chap has to carry throughout SIT. Most likely he will be cursing during Sniper and Arti drills (see above, and below)
  
• Live Range---Shooting live rounds with your rifle.
  
• Marksman---the title one gets if he manages to hit 28/32 of his targets.
• Medic--A job class in SIT (see below), in which the guy has to carry an additional stretcher with him all the time.
• Middle Finger---Another hand signal for enemy firing machine gun nearby.
  
• MO---medical officer, which gives mostly Panadol to recruits.
• Panadol---The "cure-all" drug given by MO to recruits.
• OT---Out of Training.
  
• OT, OT---Own time, own target. Only happens at the end of BMT, when the company has nothing for you to do, and you are free to carry out your own personal activities.
  
• Rifle/2nd wife/wife---the weapon that you carry with you for most of your waking time. She is oily, needs maintainance and smells of gunpowder everytime you shoot with her.
• "Sai Gang"---behind the scene, unappreciated jobs that recruits do, such as packing food rations, filling water cans, clear rubbish, etc. Cheap Labour.
• Quartermaster: Private/Sergeant in charge of organising and directing the "Sai Gang" warriors
  
• Sergeants--your superiors that teach you the most Hokkien vulgarities.
• Platoon Sergeant---Guy that gives you hell
• Shellscrape--A trench that looks like a coffin that you have to dig and sleep in.
  
• SIT test---SItuational Test. A 3 day programme in which most recruits wayang (see Wayang) to impress the assessor, on their leadership qualitities. Everyone is assigned a job class. (See LAW, medic)Obstacles have to be overcome as a team, with a team comprising people you have never seen before. The assessors only assess people during the discussion, hence the " wayang" phenomenon.
• Sniper drill---When that happens, someone has the luxury of becoming a casualty. Everyone else must carry his barang barang, put him on a stretcher and run for the next 1km (while at the same time cursing the bugger). The slower we are, the angrier the assessors, the more the casualties. Can end up half the team carrying the other half. Happens most in SIT test.
  

  Eg: "Nabei, sniper drill again. That @#$%@# must be slacking ah, kena casualty. "

  
  
• SOC---Standard Obstacle Course. Most tiring of all courses.

  Common Usage: "...SOC, sibei jialat; IPPT, lagi worse...

  
  
• Stand-By Bed/Area/Universe---Excuse for sergeants to punish you for every dirt they find in your living quarters, no matter how hard we clean the area. Also a chance for sergeants to ogle at your girlfriends' photos. If they find them attractive, the compliant recruit is persuaded to "network". Comes along with Knock it down (see above)
• Take your time---Official Name for "Ba Long Long" See above.
  
• Wayang---an act of pretense, expressing desired qualities such as leadership, when most likely they do not possess.
  
• Welfare---a generous act of giving recruits rest, once the superiors feel that they have put in their best. A rare term in BMT.
• Warrant Officers---The veterans of SAF. They have been in SAF longer than your age, hence they know every loophole in the system and are flexible. Responsible for giving recruits welfare (see above). Recruits should shout for joy if they are posted in the few companies where they are in charge.

Latest edition of Coxford Dictionary for BMTers, compiled in 2005. Subject to change. Any resemblance to real-life examples is not purely coincidental.

Updates

• My Maths teacher will only be back on Wednesday from M'sia.
  
• My Bio and GP teachers: Status Unknown. Hoping that they will be back on Wednesday as well.
  
• Online Admission: No need to write the essays about how CCA affects the course you are taking and etc. They will just consider your academic performance if you left that section blank.
• Personal statement draft written, but it is damn messy. Requires Mrs Chan to proofread (and my seniors in the same course, as well as my parents)
• The staff of the Office of Admissions is unsure about how to submit the portfolio..."You have to call the number to Medicine Office"
  
• Those at Medicine office:" Sorry, we do not really know about the portfolio; You have to ask those at the Office of Admissions."
  
• Basically, both sides are as blur as me. Great -.-'
  

Note: Press "0" after dialing the number to the Office of Admissions.

Phonecalls

Gonna make many phonecalls tomorrow; have to achieve a few objectives tomorrow.

• Enquire from the general office of RJ to see whether Ms Lui and Mr Chan Ter Yue, both my Maths and Bio teachers, are in their staffroom during the March holidays.
• If they are in, have to visit RJ one more time.
  
• Ask the Office of Admission of NUS about how to submit the portfolio, and whether the online application requires the applicant to write the online essays.
  
• Read through the books about interview and career as a lo kun, bought from Times.
• Write a personal statement draft.
• Call NTU to ask about the TCM course, just to satisfy my curiosity.
  
• If got time in the evening, go jog and do pullups.

Time now is 1940. You have until 2359 tomorrow to finish...Must be due to the army inculcating a sense of urgency/ "kan cheong"? in me...

Crossroads

Writing this post just to have a sketch and perhaps organise my life here in Singapore. Went to the NUS open house today after eating lunch at Clementi with Alvin Ong, Ginway and Raymond. Had an insight into the career of medicine and dentistry. Was glad that I came today as I had learnt more about these two options.

Have to go back to the new RJ campus to find my two teachers, Ms Lui and Mr Chan Ter Yue, my Maths and Bio teacher respectively. I am hoping that they will remember Alvin Ong and I as the both of us go and seek for their help. Then we have to spend some time later to write our personal statements and a list of CCA activities/resume. Sigh. Life of an adult is slowly creeping into our adolescent mindsets.

Must go to NTU tomorrow and find out more about their TCM course; it greatly appeals to me, though I am unsure of its prerequisites.

So many different career paths, each as mind-boggling as the other. :S

Career option A: provide a portfolio, sit through an essay test and 2 interviews. 10 years
Career option B: sit through a 3 hrs of manual dexterity test and an interview. 4 years +++(unsure of duration of postgraduate studies)
Career option C: NTU TCM. 5 years. 4 in Beijing. Double degree in TCM and science.
Career option D: combination of A and C (though it is gonna be damn long) 15 years -.-'
Career option E: NS with/without scholarship. (pls no) refuse to count....=(
F:Pharmacy
G:Science either as a professor or a teacher.
(the last three are really off-tangent; it doesn't suit me or rather my character)

Confused? So am I.

Benefit of the Doubt

In case the Desert Rose on my tagboard is really her. From now on, I shall never mention her nickname ever again in my blog; the Desert Rose has wilted, and it shall remain confined in my memory.

Back to other stuffs. Failed SOC again. Somehow, I had not learnt the proper technique of clearing the low wall. (which is in fact 2m high) In the process I had obtained more bruises and patches of blue and black along the way. The worst part was that my company(actually platoon size) had to wait unnecessarily, as we had missed our ferry in the allocated time. To rub salt to our wounds, three companies of privates cut our queue; we ended up waiting not only for them to pass, but also for the parents that came later to send their homesick boys off (the new recruits).

One day, their sons will understand the agony of waiting for other parents of other new recruits to board the ferry.

Almost Complete

Between me and freedom from BMTC stands the last hurdle---SOC or Standard Obstacle Course. Was ordered with hundreds of other unhappy recruits/privates to book in tomorrow night and be mentally and physically prepared for the grueling test.

Wanna get it over and done with. Enough of jumping over the low wall, which I failed miserably after attempting four times, due to a horribly wrong technique.

I must not give up; though countless others despair at the thought of climbing the low rope/ climbing across the monkey bar, I must tell myself that I have to clear the low wall this Friday.

Only then can I leave as a happy recruit to have lunch at mainland.

Clubbing

Amused with that notion of adult fun, though most of my army friends are addicted to it. Singapore's clubs are still moderately decent, compared to the risque hangouts overseas.

Seriously, I do notwant to go there to be tempted. Clubs=corrupted wells. What's the appeal of throbbing loud music, limited movements and the heavy stench of cigarettes which I detest? One of my friend enjoys the so-called "grinding", in which everyone in close proximity rubs against each other. :S :S :S. With hormones raging and the intoxicating effect of alcohol to boot, it is hard to restrain oneself. 1/2 of these encounters end up somewhere else, especially overseas. (using our vivid imagination, it is easy to deduce where.)

Personally, I do not ever want to be drunk. The only time I should be unconscious is when I am sleeping. Do not know how people can take the bitter taste of liquor, beer and etc. Wine is still palatable, but I find that it stings my tastebuds and tastes like medicine.

My friend is organising 3 days of "pure" adult fun of clubbing with his army friends. -.-' He says he will have self-control, limiting clubbing to drinking only. I can only hope it is true and that peer pressure doesn't influence him.

disappointed

Not referring to my results. The title refers to the 2 people that I look up to highly; one of which is my CT, the other is my warrant officer.

Initially thought nothing about my testimonial, until my friend reminded me that the fonts in it is ultra big. The worst thing is that it only occupies a page. Upon closer inspection, I saw that the sentences sounded weird.

"If you see me using big fonts, it either means that I am 'pissed off' (my own words) or that I got nothing to write about you..."
How is it that a handwritten card can piss off my CT rep so much, that he simply refuses to write about me after 2 years? Still pondering about either scenario (the latter is much better), which sounds incredulous at first. Shock slowly gives way to disappointment; at least I did my best..

The other person is my warrant officer. Always a welcome sight at Tekong, he is ever-patient and encourages us always. Though I was facing trials in BMT, he still took the time off to personally instruct me in my various tests. Am sad to see that one of the few figures, whom I regard like my godfather, takes up smoking. Doesn't he know that smoking shortens life, most smokers will die in agony? Hopefully, nothing will happen to him.

After BMT and RJ, I will rarely have the chance to meet the 2 people that I respect.

Sad to say, those are probably the last impressions of them in me. Time to move on.

Thankful

Thankful for the results that I get today. :). Shan't elaborate more; it's just a key to another door, a stepping stone to another career path. After the lock has been opened, the key will no longer be needed.

The Desert Rose is very smart (and cute to boot, =D rhymes); I respect her, for she is among the top 300, together with my best buddy. Told Raymond not to worry. I betted $10 with him that he will excel. True enough, I kept my money.

Wondering what will happen to me when I get back to my company line tomorrow. Hmm, shall go online tonight and see what has NUS gotta offer. Praying and hoping Raymond, Alvin, Ginway, and Ken Toh (basically the Treetop Community) will see each other in the same lecture theatre 3 months later. And the Desert Rose too.

Slacking at the top left corner, talking to each other a la J2 style while listening to the lecturer...The Band of Brothers

Wait to Rush, Rush to Wait

Was in the middle of shooting live rounds in the first detail, when my warrant officer asked me to stop and go to Foxtrot company to throw live grenade. Happened to be on time to practise my throwing of the dummy grenade and was attached to the last detail 44, bay 4. What a nice number.

After some deafening noise, I immediately went back to have a hurried lunch, finished my live range and went back to join Leopard company (deja vu) for their 16km route march. The Leopards seem to have a very high morale, always marching at a quick pace. I trudged on, despite the fact that I might sleep while marching. Was very tired after sleeping at 2 am for the previous night after night shoot. Last time, Scorpions and Whiskeys marched together; this time I was with Mohawks.

Was thoroughly exhausted after completing these 3 major events in 1 day.